T-Shirt – Gap Outlet Supersoft 3/4 Sleeve Tee (in store only); Chambray Shirt – Old Navy Chambray Shirt (similar); Skirt – Forever21 Classic Skater Skirt; Shoes – G.H. Bass & Co. Ankle Boots (old); Necklace – Forever21 Flower Necklace (no longer in stock); Belt – borrowed from a dress purchased at Zulily.com (similar); Bracelets – Forever21 Faceted Stretch Bracelet Set
Disclaimer: What you read below has nothing to do with outfit above. Even the title truthfully has nothing to do with the fact I’m wearing a belt (though it did work out pretty well). This post is about something much more important…about how God reminded me this weekend (once again) that He loves me and is writing an amazing story called “my life.”
Back in 1996, my mom gave me my first worship album tapes (yes, cassette tapes…CDs were still up and coming and generally too expensive for us). One of them was the VERY popular “Shout to the Lord” album by Hillsongs Music Australia. This was my first brush with contemporary Christian worship music…and as soon as I heard the title song “Shout to the Lord,” I was hooked. I fell in love with worship music, and Darlene Zschech (the worship pastor and the one who sang the song) became a major role model in my life. Since that moment, I have sung many different songs and been inspired by so many different worship leaders…but Darlene and this song would forever and always hold a special place in my life because God used it to alter the trajectory of my musical life.
I was scheduled to sing lead on this song this weekend at church.
I have to admit that, initially, there was an utter sense of disbelief (“Are they kidding me? They want me to do WHAT? In WHAT key??”). More than anything, I was completely overwhelmed by this opportunity to share the song God placed in my life that ultimately would bring me to that place…that stage…that moment. It was like coming back full circle to that moment of utter joy when He gave me this song that changed by life almost two decades ago.
Still, in my humanness and vocal limitations, my inadequacies tend to cripple me when I’m given such opportunities. I tend to shy away from “leading songs” because I feel I can never measure up (who am I that I would be asked to lead others into the presence of God?). Luckily, I sing for a God who doesn’t ask me to “measure up.” He only asks that I unreservedly seek after Him. And whatever vocal shortcomings I may have, He gives me a team of amazingly talented musicians, who’s so amazingly able in ways I am not (e.g. Amy and Alan, who took over those top notes just out of my reach after the key change). This weekend, He gave me freedom from whatever inhibitions and doubts that could have overwhelmed me so that I could sing my heart out to Him.
I’m so thankful that I sing for a God who is writing such an amazing story that is my life…brings such amazingly talented and passionate people together to be something we cannot be individually…and gives me opportunities to share with others the work He is doing in me.